By Dennis Hartley
I don’t know if you managed to catch the glorified paintball game Republican debate last night, but the Hateful 9 candidates were sure layin’ down the gauntlet on them evil tear’ists. Here’s a quick recap:
I feel safer. How about you?
By Dennis Hartley
With the announcement this week that Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl will be now be facing a military court-martial on the charges of desertion from his unit in Afghanistan in 2009, newscasters have seen fit to re-run one of Donald Trump’s Greatest Hits on a continuous loop:
Yeah, just shoot him! No trial. Lovely message to convey, with our country ensconced in a 24/7 cycle of gun violence. Very presidential.
The Commander-in-Chief of the 101st Chair-borne went on to riff, “As far as I’m concerned, send Bergdahl back, drop him right in the middle of [his former Taliban captors] and they will take care of it.”
Of course, his supporters react with wild cheers to such “straight talk”. I suspect that this is how they perceive their Fearless Leader:
But in reality, Trump’s sense of justice seems more in line with this:
By Dennis Hartley
…will resume following this public service announcement:
Programmes of violence,
As entertainment,
Brings the disease into your room.
We know the germ,
Which is man-made in metal,
Is really a key to your own tomb.
Prevention is better than cure,
Bad apples affecting the pure,
You’ll gather your senses I’m sure
Then agree to,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
And never more to fire them.
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
And never more desire them.
Children will want them,
Mothers supply them,
As long as your killers are heroes.
And all the media
Will fiddle while Rome burns,
Acting like modern-time Neros.
Prevention is better than cure,
Bad apples affecting the pure,
You’ll gather your senses I’m sure
Then agree to,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
And never more to fire them.
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
And never more desire them.
I’m speaking to the justice league of America.
The U S of A,
Hey you,
Yes you in particular!
When it comes to the judgement day and you’re standing at the gates with your weaponry,
You dead go down on one knee,
Clasp your hands in prayer and start quoting me,
‘cos we say…
Our father we’ve managed to contain the epidemic in one place, now,
Let’s hope they shoot themselves instead of others,
Help to civilize the race now.
We’ve trapped the cause of the plague,
In the land of the free and the home of the brave.
If we listen quietly we can hear them shooting from grave to grave.
You ought to,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
And never more to fire them.
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
Melt the guns,
And never more desire them.
By Dennis Hartley
Let’s see. He’s publicly insulted women, Muslims, Mexicans and Syrian refugees. He’s had an Hispanic journalist and an African-American protester somewhat pointedly ejected from his Nuremberg rallies. At this point, who hasn’t he offended?Just when you thought presidential hopeful Donald Trump had exhausted all possibilities…
Who is he starting to remind me of?
By Dennis Hartley
Enjoy. And please pass the yams…
By Dennis Hartley
From the mouths of babes. After three days of non-stop war mongering, demagoguery, and hysteria, someone finally hits the right notes:
Posts with related themes:
By Dennis Hartley
“To Ellis Island!”
Oh dearie, dearie me. So as if it wasn’t appalling enough that over half of ‘Murca’s state governors (Republicans all, save one) have banded together to stand their ground against the invading Syrian hordes, esteemed Republican presidential hopeful Cardinal Richelieu Ted Cruz has suggested that we take in Christian Syrian refugees only. Because, you know, there’s no such thing as a Christian terrorist.
Except for maybe, this guy:
On Friday, July 22, 2011, at around 3:30 p.m. local time, a 2,000-pound homemade fertilizer bomb planted in a car exploded and ripped through the central area of Norway’s capital, Oslo, blowing out windows in government offices, killing 8 people, and wounding dozens more.
As police and rescue crews rushed to the scene, 33-year-old Anders Behring Breivik had already begun to make his way to a small island called Utoya, which is about 25 miles northwest of Oslo and was at the time hosting a camp for youth members of a Norwegian political party. […]
At approximately 6:34 p.m., he surrendered without a fight to police. He had killed 67 people and wounded 33 more by then. Two more people eventually died in the hospital. He later said in court he had hoped to kill all 600 on the island.
Remember him? Interestingly, he and Sen. Cruz share some views:
In Internet postings attributed to Breivik, he blamed Europe’s left-wing parties for destroying the continent’s Christian heritage by allowing mass immigration of Muslims.
Yeah, but that was Europe, you may be thinking. There’s no history of God-fearin’ members of America’s religious right engaging in acts of terror, right?! OK, a few. Alright…maybe enough for a top dozen list.
But aside from the 2009 Holocaust Memorial Museum shooting, and the 2010 Texas IRS attack, the assassinations of abortion clinic doctors Barnett Slepian (1998) and George Tiller (2009), the 2014 Jewish Community Center murders, the 2012 Sikh Temple shooting, the 1997 Olympic bombing, and the 1995 Oklahoma City bombing, etc., what have you got? Surely those are anomalies; merely hiccups.
Besides, what good could ever come from taking in a Syrian refugee?
A real son of a (you-know-what)
Oh, Lord (in the event that you actually do exist)…give me patience.
By Dennis Hartley
Bless me father, for I have sinned. I did a bad, bad thing. Something I haven’t done in a long, long, time. Something that made my thumbs go numb, and left me feeling so…dirty. Out of morbid curiosity, I recorded all of those circle-jerk pundit shows this morning. I wanted to confirm that the Republican candidate reaction to the Paris attacks was on schedule. It was. Now I’ve worn out the “FF” button on my DVR remote. I should have stuck with my default, which is to turn to my pal Digby for a recap, instead of suffering the tortures of the damned (she’s made of sterner stuff than I). To save you even more time, here’s a distillation of all the right wing nuttery this morning:
https://youtu.be/vuP6KbIsNK4
By Dennis Hartley
The Paris attacks. There are no words. That’s why we have anthems:
…and we’ll always have Paris:
By Dennis Hartley
Jeb can fix it! Clearly, this was his campaign strategist’s inspiration: