By Dennis Hartley
(Originally posted on Digby’s Hullabaloo on May 27, 2017)
The discovery of a rusted-out VW van near the entrance of an underground cavern prompts a Texas professor/spelunker to investigate what happened to his parents, who mysteriously vanished decades before. Concerned that the professor himself may have now disappeared, two of his students organize a search party, dragging several other friends and young siblings along. From that point forward, it’s an everything-but-the-kitchen-sink miss-mash of time portals, Spanish conquistadors, Neanderthals, aliens, The Fountain of Youth, a magic ring and the end of the world. The only thing missing is a cohesive narrative (and perhaps a MST3K riff track?). Co-directors Mark Dennis and Ben Foster desperately want us to connect the dots with 1980s films like The Goonies. So I’ll play along: this is the most indecipherable sci-fi mess since Tobe Hooper’s Lifeforce.
Burn
Mr. Foster- If I may quote Roger Ebert: “Nobody starts out to make a bad movie. But it happens.” If I gave every film I watched 4 stars, I wouldn’t be a critic…I’d be a publicist. I wouldn’t take it personally (see link below). And if it’s any consolation, “Lifeforce” is one of my guilty pleasures. 🙂
http://www.rogerebert.com/chazs-blog/one-act-of-kindness-rob-schneider-and-roger
Totally get it. Taking pleasure in a film is nothing to feel guilty about though! You should own it. Lifeforce is fun, which is what we set out to do too. I think we achieved a fun and unique adventure, and it’s just a bummer to hear it called bad. Twice now! Can’t win everyone though. I’ll take Rob’s lead, and be sure to send flowers upon your death regardless.
It’s the best any of us could hope for. 😉 I used to be a stand-up comic, so believe me, I’ve been on the receiving end, in no uncertain terms (“Get off the stage!” “You suck!” etc.). Good times! Thanks for reading my blog…and for being a good sport.